June 16, 2011

Silenced!

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I lost my voice over the weekend, and what an experience it was. I had been having a sore throat since monday, was hoarse on friday, and by saturday morning, my voice just disappeared. I couldn’t talk, not even in a whisper.

Saturday was the long-awaited YA Cookout, and I was due to be Confirmed at church on sunday. How was I supposed to answer the questions by Pastor without a voice?
I learnt that just because one can’t speak,
1) people assume that they’re not listening because they don’t hear a response. They therefore nag and repeat their points over and over again.
2)your opinion is not valued, since you can’t talk back anyway
3)you get blamed instead of questioned, since you still can’t talk back.
How frustrating.
Coincidentally, I’m working on an article for the HOS, and writing about Estonian composer Arvo Part. Here’s what’s amazing – he spent eight years (!!!) of his life in contemplative silence before finally finding his composition voice. As I was thinking, praying and contemplating about how I should write this article, I sensed the Lord telling me, “Be still, my child, be still. Let others say what they want.”

“In silence is embedded the marvelous power of clarification, purification and concentration on essentials.” – Dietrich Bonhöffer

Maybe it’s not such a coincidence that I lost my voice after all.
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